Critical End!

…if it were painted on the side of a van in the ’70’s.  Other than that: Really, Disney?

Logan and Ryan 10 years from now.

I was scanning the world news this morning (You know, the non-movie related boring stuff), when this article caught my eye.  Yes, it appears that the forever awesome duo that is Matt Stone and Trey Parker have finally managed to get their Joseph Smith musical, The Book of Mormon, made…and it’s going to Broadway.  As some of you hardcore fans may recall, this isn’t the first time that the pair have gone out of their way to make fun of the Mormons.  There was a very memorable episode of South Park a few years back that dealt exclusively with the Latter Day Saint movement, and let’s not forget Trey’s turn as a confused Mormon in Orgazmo.  With all of this in mind, and the fact that it’s going to be on Broadway(!), I think we may have a hit on our hands…

…meanwhile, if case you missed this great article on Matt and Trey’s political beliefs from The Huffington Post a few months back, shame on you.

It was on this day, 20 years ago, that I can safely say that TV was redefined.  If you’ve never seen Twin Peaks, you completely owe it to yourself to sit down and watch the first season.  Fan of The X-Files, Buffy the Vampire Slayer, or more recently, Lost?  Then why oh freakin’ why have you not watched Twin Peaks yet?!  Seriously, people…

Set in the mysterious dark woods of Washington State, Twin Peaks centered around the murder of Laura Palmer.  At it’s core, the show was nothing more than a whodunit, but those who would write it off as being too simple, obviously had no clue what was in store for them.  With a cast that featured some of the craziest characters to ever grace prime time network TV (an eye patch wearing crazy woman, a dancing dwarf, a lady who carries around a log known simply to the town as “Log Lady”, and a spooky killer called BOB were just a few), the show flew in all sorts of funny, scary, and mostly just plain weird directions, which made it nearly impossible to predict.  Oh, and did Imention a young David Duchovny has a memorable bit as a cross dressing FBI agent?

Yes, the show did kind of fizzle out after they solved the murder midway through the second season.  And, yes, the movie that was supposed to tie up the loose ends was only more frustrating (and lacked most of the great TV cast), but 20 years later Twin Peaks is still must see TV at it’s absolute finest.  I’d tell you to Netflix it, but why bother when you can buy it?  Do it.

Now.

 

Twin Peaks
Season 1
 Rating:
10 out of 10

Season 2
 Rating:
9 out of 10

Twin Peaks: Fire Walk with Me
 Rating:
7 out of 10

Here at Critical End! we recognize the importance of the fans.  Hell, we’re fans ourselves!  Who else but Ryan would own a piece of the MST3K film set (I’ve seen it.)?  And who else but myself would own an album of songs recorded by Chevy Chase?  And who else but this guy would build a Bill Paxton pinball machine?  Whoa, wait…what?

Oh, crazy Bill Paxton pinball fan…will you ever learn?  Perhaps not, but no matter how crazy you may think he is, consider your average TRON fan.  Sure, we may all recall that nutty TRON guy from a few years back, but despite popular notion, not all TRON fans are complete losers with no girlfriends lame.  Take for instance the guy who made this amazing modern trailer to the original film.

So, today your pals here at Critical End! would like to salute you, fans!  Sure, some of you may live in your parents basement and smell slightly like old Cheetos, but to us…you’re family.*

*Please stop calling us, you smelly dorks.

It doesn’t surprise me that James Cameron and FOX are releasing Avatar on DVD and Blu-Ray on Earth Day.  Despite the fact that Cameron’s past explosion-filled films most likely accounted for more carbon emissions over the last few decades than Al Gore’s house in one summer, Cameron obviously realizes that there’s money to be made in this whole green movement.  Nevermind that the DVD and Blu-Ray are both bare bones, I must support Mother Earth by buying James Cameron’s Avatar on Earth Day!  That will show those evil Republicans!

As for the rest of us: Cameron himself is already talking up two, yes, freakin’ TWO, other editions that are going to come out later this year if you think you can wait that long to support this amazing grassroots movement…oh, and Cameron’s bank account.  Because let’s face it: That new back deck overlooking the slums isn’t going to build itself now, is it?

Avatar hits DVD/Blu-Ray on April 22nd…which is also Earth Day…hippie.

It’s been a VERY long time since Michael Cera has done anything of interest.  However, I’m working under the impression that with Edgar Wright directing, even an Adam Sandler film could possibly be awesome.  Long story short: It looks like Wright finally found a great use for Cera’s one note performances, and I can’t wait.

No Joke: This has to be one of the worst posters I’ve seen in a long time. 

I guess Summit Entertainment realizes that nobody actually sees these movies for the plot anyway (there was a book for that), so let’s just have our stars hang out in a dense fog and stare the public into submission.  Oh, and “It all begins…”?!  Isn’t this the third film?  They really should start warning me about these things so I don’t have to sit through the first two.  Also, I guess Stewart wasn’t available to pose that day, as it looks like they cropped two completely different images of her face together.  Check out those eyebrows!

Wocka wocka wocka!

Since our recent bashing of Tim Burton’s career is still fresh in your head, I thought I’d go ahead and share some more Burton news: Recently, Don Hahn confirmed at SXSW that Burton will direct a feature length animated version of Frankenweenie as his next project.  Hahn is executive producing.  The news of this remake is really nothing new, as it’s been rumored for some time now, but it’s still somewhat upsetting for a couple of reasons.

I have to ask: What was wrong with the original?  I thought it was quick and funny.  Has Burton reached the point in his career where he’s going to start remaking (and consequently ruining) his own films now?  And for Disney?  And in 3D?

Speaking of 3D, WHY Burton?  Didn’t you used to be a unique director who was anything but conventional?  You do realize that this 3D thing is a passing gimmick, right?  I’m about to just give up on you, dear sir, which is rather sad.

Full story at CHUD.

As promised:

With the release of both Tron Legacy and Predators, 2010 is really shaping up to be a nerd’s delight. If you caught the first Legacy trailer before Alice and Wonderland, you already know how many socks it’s mostly likely going to rock off of various nerd feet.  However, little is know about Predators, besides the cast.

Last week at SXSW, producer Robert Rodriguez showed some select footage which has now been posted on the official site. I must say that I’m now even more excited about this. Rodriguez has put together a great cast and it’s clear he’s going to respect the past films as well.

Tron Legacy opens in December while we only have to wait until July for Predators.  Yay!

Much like Tim Burton making Alice in Wonderland, the thought of Ridley Scott making Robin Hood bores the hell out of me.  And to top it all off, casting Russell Crowe (remember him?) as the title character pretty much guarantees that you’ll fall asleep during the first reel.  In fact, this may be the first trailer that I’ve watched for an unreleased film and thought, “Haven’t I seen this movie already?”

Check it out for yourself and feel free to start placing bets on how many Oscars it will win in our comment section.

If you’re anything like me or Ryan, you’re still trying to get over Sunday night’s Oscars.  Personally, I’m considering therapy.  In case you missed it (lucky), I’d love to tell you that there were some highlights, but besides the stunning “tribute” to “horror” and the moment where some crazy honky chick crashed the show, there’s not much to talk about.

Except for this:

Now then, I think it’s rather obvious that the entire thing was just pissing Reeves off, however for some reason MTV has actually made the Internet believe that this may really be happening…which it isn’t…unless it does…which it won’t.

Expect it in 3D this summer.

I can list all sorts of reason why this clip isn’t worth watching (Just a few: New SNL needs a laugh track to make it even appear funny, I’m still waiting for them to stop promoting Obama and start making fun of him, and there’s a blatant political agenda behind this entire video), but I can list one very solid reason why it’s completely worth watching.  It begins around 3:50 if you just want to skip ahead…I’d reccomend it.

For comedy that is actually funny, please don’t forget NBC’s Community returns tonight at 8!

I’ll be the first to admit that this photo really tell us nothing at all about the upcoming John Landis directed Burke and Hare.  Hell, for all we know, it could have been taken while a somewhat fat Simon Pegg and Andy Serkis bar-hopped around London dressed like 19th century Irish murderers.  Whatever the case, these pictures prove that Ryan and I did not invent the John Landis comeback story (or Chevy or Pee-wee for that matter), as some rival websites are now claiming…I’m looking at you, Entertainment Tonight Online Experience.  See all of the pics over at TotalFilm!

Next week on Critical End!…

Get ready for the Oscars, kids!  Oh, and Ryan starts the long road down Alec Baldwin’s “career”!

It’s been a while since we’ve said anything about the upcoming Nightmare on Elm Street remake.  Last we spoke, we were excited, with a slight hint of doubt.  Possibly because we didn’t know much about the actual characters.  Now that the film is only two months away, the first trailer has hit the internet (myspace, to be exact), and it’s somewhat of a downer mostly due to the fact that I feel like I’ve seen most of the film already.  Sure, it’s not as bad as the Death at a Funeral remake, but there’s enough scenes shot the exact same as the original that I’m sure this is going to make a great drinking game for dateless horror nerds.  Judge for yourself and feel free to let us know in the comment section:

A Nightmare on Elm Street Trailer 2 in HD

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