Critical End!

There is something very creepy going on in the bottom right of this photo.

It comes as a surprise to pretty much nobody that Iron Man 2 was the number one film this past weekend.  While the actual box office itself didn’t set any #1 records (it placed fifth for all-time best grossing weekend), I was a bit surprised to learn that it did set the record for the widest release in motion picture history(4,380 theaters to be exact), beating former record holder The Dark Knight by a mere 14 theaters. 

Meanwhile, repeat business is supposed to make it’s overall box office climb even higher.  If you’re one of those nerds- I mean, people…no wait, nerds will do…that plan on seeing it again, why not check out some of the confirmed Easter eggs that CHUD dug up.

So, what did your pals here at Critical End! Think about it?  Find out tomorrow in our podcast!

Ya got me.  I’m pretty psyched for Machete.

If you listened to our last podcast, you’re probably aware of my love for director Vincenzo Natali, despite the fact that I can’t pronounce his name and I thought he was French, when in actuality he was born in Detroit.  Do I really know what the hell I’m even talking about?  As usual, the answer is no. 

With this in mind, I think it may be time to pull a much loved (by us anyway) Critical End! Film School session and review his first three full length films.  For those of you who haven’t been paying attention in class, this is along the lines of what I did previously for the Silent Night, Deadly Night series, and what Ryan is doing currently for Alec Baldwin‘s career.  The three films that I’ll be taking a critical look at in the coming weeks are Cube, Cypher, and Nothing.  All three of these films are available on Netflix, and I can also tell you that two of them are already classics in my book, so why not rent them now so you can be ready to disagree with me when the time comes?

Oh yeah, and as some of you may realize, all of this is in preparation for a film called Splice which opens in a few weeks.  We’ll be reviewing that as well.

With only one episode left in it’s inaugural season, Community has managed to remain at the top of it’s game for over 22 episodes now.  It’s also reached a comfortable spot where the writers feel that they can experiment with different types of non-sitcom formats and styles.  Such is the case with tonight episode, which producers have promised is basically going to be a 25 minute paintball fight:

So, if you’re still not watching this show: Now is the time.

This podcast is your boyfriend now.  REVIEWED: A Nightmare on Elm Street (2010).  PLUS: Trailer talk!

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Chevy Chase drops by to deliver the "Happy Town" ratings to his old friend Sam Neill.

Catch ABC’s Happy Town last Wednesday?  That’s okay, because most of the country didn’t either.  In fact, according to UGO, only 5.2 million people tuned into Happy Town, which officially makes it the lowest rated new ABC show this year.  Ouch.

And what did those 5.2 million think?  Well, a quick glance at the IMDB message board for the show reveals lots of post subjects like “No denying it…they ARE ripping off Twin Peaks”, “Trying a little too hard to be like Twin Peaks”, and my personal favorite, “what the hell is twin peaks??”  Honestly, all of these people are likely right.  We’ve only seen the first episode of Happy Town so far, but it seems rather obvious that it’s trying to bank on the fact that most people don’t remember (or couldn’t figure out) the basic twists of Twin Peaks.

Happy Town airs tomorrow night at 10 PM EST.  Care to place any bets on how much longer it’s going to stick around?

Here’s the first image of Thor from Kenneth Branagh’s upcoming Marvel film.  I have to say, I’m surprised that they’re sticking this closely to the costume from the comics.  I thought they’d try to make it look a bit darker, maybe lose the big red cape.  I wonder how weird this guys’ going to look standing next to Iron Man in the Avengers movie?  On the upside, I still can’t really believe there’s going to be an Avengers movie.  All my 7th grade fantasies are coming true!  Except for the one about that chick who sat behind me in Math class…

[Yahoo! via /Film]

Quick reminder: Happy Town premieres on ABC tonight at 10PM EST.  While I know that several of you don’t have the time to invest in yet another Lost inspired serial show, this might be one to catch.  Despite the mostly mediocre early reviews, I find it hard to not want to watch any show that proudly claims to be a direct Twin Peaks rip off and star the amazing duo of talent that is Sam Neill and Steven Weber.  Genius?  I think so.

…but it could also really suck.  Check out the extended promo for yourself below and let us know what you think after the show tonight.

Here we go again!

According to /Film, everyone’s favorite dread pirate and evil tornado enthusiast has signed on for Saw VII, reprising his role from the original.

It’s easy to see this as a desperate attempt to inject some life into a series that’s been running low on good ideas lately, but the plot–which centers around a support group for Jigsaw survivors–has some potential.  If they manage to get through the whole thing without yet another hackneyed flashback starring Shawnee Smith, I’ll be pleasantly surprised.

Hey kids, just wanted to remind you that this is an actual film, and it’s coming out in two months.  This should be more than enough time for you to start avoiding the theater.  Hell, I happened to pass by a theater with this poster outside on my way to work this morning and I now plan on taking the longer route just to avoid it.

PS: Is it just me or is Spade showing WAY too much leg in this picture?

UPDATE: There’s also a Japanese version!

As a child of the 80’s, I have very distinct memories of commercials like this one for Lots-o’-Huggin’ Bear.  Take a look…

I am literally buried under a mountain of sense memory right now.  Which is all the more impressive, considering that this isn’t actually a vintage commercial, but a brand new bit of viral marketing for Toy Story 3.

Too much hugging, one presumes.

That is some impressive mimicry, Pixar.  More evidence that these guys are deeply committed to manipulating me emotionally.  WHY DID THAT SLUT HAVE TO ABANDON JESSIE FOR MAKEUP AND BOYS, DAMMIT?!!?!

Also, if you’re like me, you’re now looking for either this…

…or this…

I never noticed the jaunty key change in the Kid Sister section of the jingle. Girls are always showing off.

Super best friends.

Last week, out of the blue, I received the following text from my sister:

Stone and Parker are going to get murdered by the Muslims.  I’m calling it.

I laughed it off at the time, but unfortunately a few days later it looks like she might be right.  In case you missed it, and I’m not sure how that’s possible as this is now national news, Matt and Trey once again tried to get an image of Muhammad on their show…and once again Comedy Central went and screwed them over.  In fact, I feel like this whole thing exploding is really Comedy Central’s fault.  Especially when you consider that Matt and Trey have done it before in the season 5 episode “Super Best Friends”.  Obviously, that episode aired before 9/11 (only by a few months), but isn’t it funny that out of all the shit that Comedy Central let’s Matt and Trey get away with, the one thing they won’t let them do is something that they already let them do?

Anyway, don’t bother looking for either episode as Comedy Central has removed both of them from their site.  I can only imagine how they plan to screw up the Season 14 DVD release as well.

Dogs don't wear suits!

Like many, I came out of Men In Black II disappointed.  The story was kind of lame, Tommy Lee Jones’s reintroduction could have been much more epic, and it suffered from trying to cram in every character from the first film.  I think I’m going to start calling that “Crank 2 Syndrome”.

In any case, I still thought the series had potential, which is why it’s good to hear that both Will Smith and Tommy Lee Jones have agreed to a third film.  Here’s the thing, though:  Without the dynamic of introducing a new recruit to the Men In Black (which both movies used), what’s this movie going to be about?  Maybe they’ll be forced to make the plot itself interesting.  Or perhaps they’ll just write in a new rookie agent, treating us once again to the classic “small gun is surprisingly dangerous” bit.

Oh, and it’s in 3D.